Managers spend a lot of time thinking about how their team is doing. They often spend much less time thinking about themselves.
On a recent course, one manager described two months spent almost constantly on the road, living in hotels. She hadn’t been able to swim or go for a run, the two things that normally keep her well. I asked what she started to notice, and she said she had become edgy, frustrated and agitated inside. As soon as she got home and went for a run, she felt better almost immediately.
Her question was simple: “When I don’t have the time, what can I actually do?” It’s a question a lot of managers will recognise, whether the pressure comes from travel, a heavy workload or both.
Know your own warning signs
What I liked about her answer is that she already knew her early warning signs. Edgy, frustrated, agitated. That is the first step for any of us.
Everyone’s signs are different, but common ones include:
- Losing patience more quickly, with people at work or at home
- Sleeping badly, or waking up already thinking about work
- Feeling flat, or that nothing is enjoyable
- Relying more on alcohol, caffeine or sugar to get through
- Dropping the things that normally keep you well
These signs are useful. They tell you something needs to change before it turns into something bigger. Our article on burnout and what actually helps covers what can happen when they are ignored for too long.
Your early warning signs aren’t a weakness. They are information.
Do a smaller version of what keeps you well
When we can’t do the thing that keeps us well, we often do nothing at all. But a smaller version still counts, and it is far better than none.
- If you can’t go for a run, go for a brisk ten minute walk before breakfast
- If there is no pool, use the hotel gym, or do a few simple exercises in your room
- Take the stairs, walk to the meeting, get outside at lunchtime
- If time is the problem, put it in your diary like a meeting and protect it
- Notice how you feel afterwards. That is often the best motivation to do it again
Look after the basics, especially on the road
Travel and long days chip away at the things we take for granted. A few habits help:
- Sleep. Keep roughly the same bedtime, and put the phone away before you sleep
- Food. Eat proper meals rather than whatever is quickest
- Alcohol. The hotel bar can quietly become a habit. Notice it
- Connection. Call home, not just to check in on logistics but to talk
- Downtime. Some time each day that is not about work, even if it is short
Look at the workload, not just yourself
Self care helps, but it can’t fix a workload that is simply too much. If you are constantly stretched, it is worth asking honestly:
- What can be dropped, delayed or done less perfectly?
- What can I delegate, and to whom?
- What am I holding onto that someone else could do?
- Have I told my own manager how stretched I am?
Asking for help with workload isn’t a failure. It is a decision that protects you, your team and the work.
Why it matters for your team too
When a manager is running on empty, the team feels it. Patience gets shorter, decisions get rushed, and it becomes much harder to notice that someone else is struggling. Looking after yourself is not selfish. It is part of being able to look after them.
And when you model it, by taking a lunch break, going for a walk or not sending emails at midnight, you give your team permission to do the same.
When to get more support
If low mood, anxiety, irritability or exhaustion carry on for more than a couple of weeks, or start affecting your sleep, relationships or work, don’t wait. Speak to your GP, your employee assistance programme if your organisation has one, or someone you trust.
If someone needs support now
Encourage them to speak to their GP. Out of hours in Scotland, they can call NHS 24 on 111.
Samaritans: call 116 123, free, any time.
If somebody is in immediate danger, call 999.
Questions managers ask about looking after themselves
How can managers look after their own mental health?
Start by knowing your own early warning signs, such as irritability, poor sleep or losing patience. Protect a small version of whatever keeps you well, look after sleep and food, stay connected to people outside work, and ask for help with workload before it becomes a crisis.
How do I look after myself when I travel a lot for work?
Find the smallest version of the thing that keeps you well. A ten minute walk, the hotel gym, a few exercises in your room or the stairs instead of the lift. Put it in your diary like a meeting, keep in touch with people at home, and watch alcohol and late nights.
Is it selfish for a manager to prioritise their own wellbeing?
No. A manager who is running on empty has less patience, makes poorer decisions and is less able to notice when someone else is struggling. Looking after yourself is part of looking after your team.
When should a manager get more support?
If low mood, anxiety, irritability or exhaustion carry on for more than a couple of weeks, or start affecting your sleep, relationships or work, speak to your GP, your employee assistance programme if you have one, or someone you trust.
This article is part of our practical guide to workplace mental health training for UK employers.
Support for the people who support everyone else
Our mental health training for managers includes looking after yourself, not just your team. We also offer wellbeing workshops and support for managers under pressure.